Tuesday, November 07, 2006

How To Be Creative If I Never Thought I Could

Indeed I haven't been writing biweekly, and it's not like I've had that many distractions. Welcome to the Dude-Plex I do have one interfering with my endless freedom tomorrow though, and part of next week: an agency has granted me a temp gig replacing old computers with new for a few business locations. (I figured that company had their own people for that but oh well.) It's $20/hour and I'm scheduled for 8 hours each day, but tomorrow's gig I suspect will only take 2-3 hours. C'est la vie. It's a gateway drug, I should hope, into better things somehow and somewhere. I've received word that where I used to work is dismantling the department I was in, moving people either to the lower tier we have been making fun of or to different cellular providers' contracts. Looks like I got out of there (bum's rush fashion) when the getting was good. I still have not collected a penny in unemployment yet due to hoop-jumping and another hurdle was thrown in front of me today: they want me to attend a class about how to find a job, manditory attendance or no payment will be made, on a day & at a time that I have a job. I called their number to let them know I need to reschedule, but since I got voicemail I suspect they'll claim I didn't tell them. Shit's sake, it seems easier to get Welfare for not working than Unemployment for working, and having paid into the system for years it's not like it's THEIR money that I'm asking for.

The stupidity of the moment is the rainfall; while it's okay near my home (I live one block, in two directions, from a creek which flooded this last January -- it was empty for the first two days of rain, and is full now but not overfull... yet) ten miles away it's kinda nasty along the Puyallup River, and much worse on the Skykomish River, where the community of Index has been cut off from the rest of the world (guess they'll just have to play bar-darts and wait...) and the logging town of Sultan is freakin' underwater (which makes me sad because it's a nice place). dried luneria in autumn It's fairly easy to count your blessings when you turn on the TV and see places you recognise not far away with one or two feet of water running down the main street, ya know?

Monster.com's tagline is "Today is the day"... meaning, in their context, now is the right time to get a new job. In my context, it should mean that now is the right time to find a new direction rather than seeking another office or menial labor job. I've been talking online with an author, artist, and journalist who visibly has few responsibilities and seemingly has income, and I find that to be the dream gig for me. I'm sure it's a different story when one is there, having to sing for one's supper at all times because doesn't have a steady employer and you do have to keep your publisher happy by having material to submit, but from this distance it looks like it's a hell of a lot more enjoyable than what I've been doing (or trying to do) for all of my adult life. This requires both risk and connections; the former I am scared of because of the fall - the latter I lack and would need something with which to prove I'm worth paying attention to. What's interesting to me, having come to know the person who is giving me this bit of food for thought, I've noticed that despite the books and TV shows and articles and inspiration others have claimed she has given them for their own art or personal direction... she questions her direction, her worth, and her worthiness. Success is not an absolute even if you have it.

Is today the day? I wish.

the dismantling, allegedly, is only temporary. after new years, the ranks of the undead will swell. they will shuffle through the hallways moaning "AHT", "CSTS", and "FCR"
And like the undead, they will be wandering without a clear direction -- and will eat the brains of those unfortunate enough to cross their paths. You have to love any company whose motto is: If it ain't broke, break it.
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