Sunday, September 09, 2007

What am I going to do with you... beside the obvious?

now show me yours, JamieGreetings, all. It's been busy here in the magical land of The Mushroom, and fraught with stupidities that are mostly of my own doing so it seems. As promised last time and Jamie Dawn asked about in the previous entry's comments, here is the fence I have been building. Or half of it, anyway. The other half hasn't been completed, and there an interesting story about why that is... I'll finish the fence in a couple days, when I'm off work on Tuesday. So, here's what's happened and what's stupid about it:

* Tuesday, we went to Lowe's and bought the materials. Six 4x4s, five 6'x6' panels, 20 brackets, a box of screws (5 pounds by weight, no mention of how many that is but 4 holes per bracket = need 80 screws), 660 pounds of Quikrete™, and a post hole digger. Yes, I will agree with the people who say renting an auger is easier on the anatomy than trying to use a post hole digger, but it can be done if there's dirt where you're digging... and I'm almost still young and spry. We also rented a truck from Lowe's, which is $20 for 75 minutes, such a bargain! Getting everything home and offloaded to return the truck in time, that was the challenge.

* Wednesday, hole digging and pole planting and concrete laying. I decided to put the fence about 6 inches into my side of the property line so the goofs next door would not have any say or sway over it. The neighbors were home the entire time and some deliveries were delivered, but they never once stepped out front. There was work going on, that's it. It probably wasn't until the teenager got home around 5pm and said, "Did you know the neighbors are building a fence?" that they were fully aware. So I put in five poles, confirmed they were plumb and about 72 inches apart, and poured the concrete. Can't do much more until that's dry, right? Did not attempt to make hole number six because I thought it would be too far out into the road and we ran out of concrete (the package says two will do one hole... but not the way I dig holes!). Another measure once the fifth pole was up, however, indicated that there's still room at the edge of the property for the last pole. I'll worry about that in a couple days. The neighbors have added another junk car that far down the driveway, so there is a new need for the fence there so we don't have to look at it.

and show me Courtney's too* Thursday, hang the fence pieces. And this is where it gets stupid. It seems I measured from the middle of the posts, not the ground, so while it may be 72 inches at one point it's less than 72 inches at the bottom -- and those sections are 71½ inches wide, meaning that some can be put in with a hammer and some sanding while others are going to require a little sawing to even come close. More work than it's supposed to be due to miscalculations, arrrgh. So I put up two and it took all day to get them shaved/sanded/cut/pounded in. The woman on the other side of the fence did come out and say it looked good, and when her useless son asked if we needed help we said no... and never saw him again. I've taken to calling this project "the in-spite-of fence" because it's not put up out of spite, but put up in spite of them not keeping their pledge to replace their fence two years ago.

Hmm, life otherwise has been okay, and the skanks across the street are having a yardsale but it's mostly hidden by their overgrown trees and canopies, with only one easily missable cardboard sign on a telephone pole. The next door neighbor on the other side of the yard says they'll be gone by October but they seem not to be in any great hurry to move or sell anything. You know they're not going to take the two dozen cats with them, so the Humane Society will have to be called before things get stupid(er) with the kitties.

The fence looks great!
One would never know that any stupidities existed in the process of putting it up.
The neighbors had hot coals of guilt poured over their heads with this fence.
I'd say two years was long enough to wait for them to do what they said they would, but can you imagine the crappy fence they would have put up if they HAD kept their word??
If junk cars are in their yard, then I doubt their version of a fence would have looked very good.
They probably look over at that fence and say, "Gee! I guess that's what things look like when someone gives a crap!"
Junkers beside you and skanks across the street!
You and Paige must feel like gods around these people!! :-)
First things first... I got the other half of the fence put up today and still had enough daylight to measure CORRECTLY, buy concrete, dig a hole and plant that last post. Will be mounting it tomorrow. Pictures of the fifth panel may. Celebration definitely will, since we won't have to see those cars anymore! :) What it looks like now:
When A Man Gives A Crap About A Fence

There were plenty of stupidities. One just has to look closely to find them, photos don't show them well. :) I did find a fix for my 71" blunder, which will be described next entry. Oh, and the neighbor does care about her yard, especially the back, but apparently not the driveway area in front of her garage, which is where the fence is.
Oh, and you see a car at the right in the photo? So do I, which is why there's a fifth panel going up. :)
Post a Comment

<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?